haze

TRUST IN LOVE
they said you never live your life with the one you truly love...i wonder is that true?

what i want... i don't think anyone in this world will be able to give it to me.. maybe my expectations was too high..right from the start i wanted too much.

i used to think..that love conquers all.. if you love someone, there's no such things as learning how to treat a person right....

all this while...i have been reaching out with my heart..

i still remember the first day... eventhough i was the first one who make the move n hold his hand.....now i wonder why i did it ...
everytime my sister kiss my cheek..i remember him kissing me. god..how i miss him...


there were times when i ran wild with my imagination drowning me..especially when i m in bed.... wish he was on top of me...kissing me..touching me.. will i seem insane if i type down every thing i imagine?



i have never wanted someone so much before.. .. i wonder if is just my hormones...or izzit really him..hehe.

will imagine him holding me..his strong arms round me..carrying me to the bed...

i just wish he'll stop lying to me.. why must he lie to me all the time...do i seem that stupid to him????



..... sigh..

i wanna belong to him so so much..


he told me...~i not onli love u.....i wan u all to myself...and neber let u go..~

......i really hope that they are true...... ..i'll never forget these words...never....

he can tie me, bind me..with string or ropes..or love... just don't let me go... wanna be in his arms forever..and ever...


i know its dangerous for me to think like this..hell i m only 17.
but i don't wanna regret...after our first date.. i really regret we never make love... really do regret..


i don't trust him....but...maybe i can trust love?....can i trust the love he shower on me? despite all the lies... and vulnerability and jealousy...

can i trust love?