Family

All children disappoint their parents.

We often say "We do not get to choose who our parents are"
but in fact, they do not get to choose who their children will be.

Some parents don't give a fuck.
Most parents just want the best for us.

Some parents can't wait for us to leave the house
Most parents just want to cage us forever.

We are never perfect and never will be.
So forget the Stepford family that you are trying to portray.
We all have skeletons in our closet.
and we just want you to love us, skeletons beers smokes and all.

Sometimes we rebel.
Most of the times, we compromise and wait for the storm to be over.
Most of the times, we can't wait to get out of the house to be with our friends or girl friends or boy friends.
Most of us treat home like a hotel.

but that doesn't mean we don't love our parents.
but sometimes, we do push their patience and test their unconditional love for us.

that's what children do.

there comes a breaking point where a child turns 18 or 21 and become mature.
but not all parents change the way they talk or treat their grown up child when that happens.
to them, we are still their baby in diapers.

there comes another point where that child will force out of their cage.
some doesn't.

I love my dad very much. sometimes i feel the urge to keep him at my side at all times.
i feel the urge to control him. and his life.
most of all, i feel the urge to sort his life in order and make him happy.
i even told people I want to marry him. what the fuck right.
but i don't.

because I know that for the man that he is, he is capable of living his own life to his satisfaction.
I am grateful for he feels the same for me ( i think)


sometimes.. we just gotta have faith in our parents' or children's capability to go on without us.
it may even be unsettling to know that they probably get on happier without us.
but it is a price that only unconditional love can pay.

if you have been caging someone for long, he will break out soon and never come back.
learn to let go.. and you'll find that he will come back to you.

who am i to teach you... when i have no mother. and my father is all i have.
well, its heartwrenching to see lovey dovey families. i never had that.
its even more painful to see normal families arguing. i never had that.

just don't want you to lose what you have. that's all there is.