haze

TWIST OF FATE [happy valentine's day!!]

y must things turn out to be like this??
i know it isn't his fault but i can't help getting angry with him..

y is fate toying with us?? DON"T U FUCKING KNOW WE R IN LOVE???? pls.. dun play with us anymore... my heart cannot bear such pain..

a year ago yesterday......................................

both of us talking on the phone happily bout wat to do tomoro when we meet....bout how we'll kiss..touch n talk..
when morning comes.. i realize..bad hair day!! GREAT.
i went to tuition..happy n grinning widely.. he smsed my phone a few times telling his wherabouts n where we'll meet... after a few changes of location..we finally decided on the hilton hotel lobby... but i had no idea how to get there..
thanks to chengyee..i finally made it there.. the minute i got out off the taxi.. my hp beeped with sms..

i went in.. searching... n suddenly..he was in front of me.. so this is how he looks like.. i tot... i shake everyone else's hand but when he offered his.. i turned away...haha.. weird..

we walked to his dads car... n i sat there.. blanked out.. n looked out the window like i always do... he talked to me... n surprisingly....i instinctively bent down my head towards his shoulder.. n i even touched his hand!! i was never this brave with other guys..

he kept playing with the buttons on my jeans n i swatted his hand..hehe so naughty..

when we reached the eatery... we got out... i tried to hold his hand.. but he let go..
kinda disappointed....

i ordered prawn mee for him...n lam mee for myself..n to my horror!!!.his mom order sour plum juice for me!!!! i hate those stuff.. i felt like gagging when i force it down my throat.. n he won't drink it for me... so bad..
then the food arrived.. i began eating as if i m famished.. slurpin n slsshing.. then i stoped n remembered he's there..hehe.. n i ate more politely..

he asked me whether did i cut my hair..n i was like shaking bit..(no i din cut...)then nodding.(i did cut....).then shaking..(but cut so little...who knows?)...then nodding again..( of cos he knows..hes my bf..)

then he did something really cute.. he mimicked me nodding n shaking..haha..

in the end.. i had to force that drink down..n i felt like vomiting it all out...wat to do..for him...aih.

then we went to his aunts house..i think. then we got our own time all by ourselves.
but evertime i wanna touch him.. its like he dun like..maybe i used the wrong way?? dunno.... but he gave a pretty much surprises when he hug me back... n touch my chin.. he even kissed my hand in the taxi... hehe. feels so nice..

at the shopping centre....he bought me 2 lollipops..we shared one together..i'll never forget the taste..since then...cola lollipop been my fave lollipop... i remembered how warm it was after it was in his mouth..... :)
we took pics.. those machine ones..hesaid he triedto kiss me.. but i dun think so..maybe he is right..i m turning my head too much...

he hugged me real tight n warm..... felt so nice n safe in his embrace...
wish he could hold me like that forever..

then..when he had to go.. we were taking the escalator..n he kissed my cheek!... so nice......... my first kiss.
in the lrt.. i wanted to put my body close to his..n hug him close.. but i dun dare.. scared he dun like...
he went home.. i was so upset.. i threw the lollipop stick on the ground..flung it real hard.

went back home..oh.. long story..n it spoils the romance.

now... its a year since i last hold him.... n i miss him so much...

i wish that i could be with him forever even if i had to lose 10 years of my life.


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