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gothic kitties

lets start with a bang

the nut goth ( i want a scar going from my eye to my lips and then draw a triangle on my left cheek...)

the sad goth

the suicidal goth

the exquisite corpse ( goth loves young and beautiful corpses that are preserved.. i think)

the goth doll (she is not naked la)

the angry goth ( i want the eye make up curved wan!!and then got 3 come down n curve up!!)

the clown goth

no more di


my sis asked me ' who make the lord god?'

i dunno how to answer


ignore the ah beng on the left...
on the right is korea cho jae jin...... no 19.. SWOONS..


Kam Ka - Weng: all drop lah
haze: that one i agree la
Kam Ka - Weng: T__T
haze: last sem = spend most money = worst results in mmu lifetime = fucked up = broke
haze: i m putting that in my blog. BAH BAH BAH
Kam Ka - Weng: sigh
Kam Ka - Weng: Sucks balls
Kam Ka - Weng: worst
Kam Ka - Weng: sem


omg i totally forgot bout archives... HAHHAHA... now i know why my blog so empty

what is wrong with this picture?

kate bosworth

her eyes are off different colours, hazel n blue... its something called Heterochromia iridium..

note : there will be a sin city 2 ( which angelina jolie might be in) and a spiderman 3 coming up next year.

meeqa meeqa meeqa

i cannot believe mao is so fat already. look at him!!!


things to do before i graduate

1. compose a song n be famous
2. earn lotsa cash thru some webbie
3. get invited to zouk plus 50 tix to give away to friends
4. try not to get married.


too much to say. no one to listen.


all i want is just to control u know?? be in control. of myself. of my life. of PEOPLE. people around me .
of you. YOU.
lick that spot. wipe that spot. hold this. do this. do that.

power. feels great.
i tell you to do something .. YOU listened. YOU did it. i feel powerful.

... but
you did everything i wanted. when i never even told you to. YOU listened . you did it. i feel loved.

sometimes you know wat i want more than i do. really.


i cannot live in this house. its draining out all my happiness.


i just finished watching requiem for a dream..starring ellen burstywn, jared leto, jennifer connelly, and marlon wayans.

its so haunting that i dun think i can ever sleep again without thinking of this movie.
the soundtrack is orchestrated by kronos quartet orchestra which only adds depth to the movie

its about 4 individuals. sarah the mother, harry the son, marion the girlfriend and tyrone the best friend.

it starts with harry n tyrone taking his mother's television set to sell in order to get money for drugs.
which led to harry n tyrone trying to distribute drugs for money. marion is hooked on drugs too but depended on harry for her 'bread'.

while sara, the mother got chosen for a television show and decided to slim down by taking diet pills. after some time she got hooked on it and started hallucinating.

the money came in effortlessly to harry and tyrone but after a shootout, the drugs distribution were stopped.

and then I CANNOT TAHAN!!!!
.. and then sara got insane n sent to hospital ...
and then marion decided to whore and have orgy( all shown in full flesh) to get the drugs.
and then harry n tyrone travelled to miami to get drugs but harry's arm got .... infected?
n tyrone sent him to the hospital.
which leads to harry's arm being amputated. and tyrone being caught by the police in the hospital.

the end. but it was good. n gory.
aside from a tragedic ending... which is against the myth of storytelling, its rather good.
but i detest the orgy and whoring scene, i was screaming NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO in the room n my sister is wondering why m i so agitated.
the acting were damn powerful, there is chemistry well... technically and figuratively. the soundtrack is amazing and the editing is hypnotic.

let me show u why.

Paris Stars Are Blind

its so cheap i bet my mtv is better

just checkin '

i have watched forrest gump ... twice. before.
n both times, instead of laughing i cried so much until i thought there was something wrong with me.

today i watched it again. n happy to say, i did not cry. not one bit. in fact i do not see why i cried last time.

maybe its because i picture myself as him n getting insulted n bullied at all the time. people just laughing at me. thats y i pity him n i cried. n i think i cried everytime he ran, which is like the whole movie. because he ran in a weird way n i must have thought that was pathetic and sad to have such a habit, that was why i cried.

n this was also why..
having something bad about yourself that you can never change.
whether its stupid, legless, ugly or unlikable.

i was a pessimist last time .. now i m not.

doing great with meeqa. he would stay on my chair for a long time n nuzzle my thigh til i snap at him saying that its ticklish.. he is more considerate now, when he is inside my shirt he cling on to the shirt instead of my body so that i would not be that painful.


self explanatory


speaking of disasters..

i brought my sister to ice skating today, i had hoped the day to be enjoyable.
but it was of anger.

she was a spoilt brat losing temper and giving faces while i was a scowling sister who almost hit her.
i do not understand when she was 5, she seemed fine. but now she well, isnt. since she fell down on an average of 4 minutes once in that ....1 or 2 hour we skated. while i did not fall at all, well because i was tagging her all the time n blowing insults at her.

oh well, there goes her interest and my only possible skating partner. where oh when oh how can i have someone to go ice skating with me.

hard to love something without sharing the joys of it with others, but it seems like it can be such pain for others instead.
ice skating is a thang where some people will jump n plead to be there but also a sport where others see that its a ALIEN, a risk of losing face n warmth when they fall.

first went with my cousins, whom slowly dropped out of interest i do not know why since the girl cousins netted their first shoal of boyfriends there and the boy cousins eagerly helped the fallen girl victims.
then i finally managed to plead my girlfriends in high school, but who happily agreed that it was too crowded when they were there.
and then i went with a certain someone that was a severe case of patience testing and really a risk of losing face and warmth.
now finally its zeek and celine or tan. but its hard to time with them.. i mean our money. sometimes i dun have it, sometimes its others. i dunno.

been a long day being a sister. it would be easier being a mother cuz i would not feed her nonsense like this one was.
tired of keeping good relations, i find myself having symptoms of smokers trying to quit. i see bad qualities in people around me.

my sis is not the smart, bold to the hilt, independant girl i wanted her to be. she asked me for opinion for everything even when she have to throw the rubbish. she couldnt do a thing on her own without asking 2000 questions. she couldnt cross the road without looking 10 secs left, 10 secs right then looking at me FOREVER until i gave her the cue to cross.

well i m being too much, cuz she ain't me. she does not lie like i do when i was a .....2?, she did not sneak out to shopping complexes after school like i did when i was ... 9. which was why i know how to cross roads after 3 bloody accidents. in fact she is much better n less troubled than me. i m after all, problemed. and she is.. sheltered, still sheltered from this world's gory.

off post- omg i just saw 5 minutes of 'requiem for a dream'. its blardy good. damn good.shit i cant stop previewing it .. haha... its really nice
and the kiss because i m a girl is not subtitled. CRIES

Kiss - Because I'm A Girl

finally found this. this one had the english subtitles... OMG OMG OMG


梅艳芳+张学友 相爱很难

相爱很难 by jacky cheung, anita mui
highlight to see translation..

i wish i can love til the rest of my life
but who can place love as their life's main interest

life's actual purpose is to search for the right one
but we all have to face the fact that hot passion will turn into bitter
tears in the end..

but i m not smart nor lucky enough.. to face the trials of love

but two hands that are too closely wrapped around another


love will cross its borders and change lovers into enemies

maybe relationship is too hard
the thing is, both parties have different hopes and expectations.

one sided relationship is hard too
have to face all the awkwardness and guilt til we are neither moving forward or

maybe i dun love.. then its not hard
but before i am a nun, i already fear for love's future

relationships are difficult. not being in a relationship is also difficult.
before happiness could arrive, there is the responsibility of facing each other's statuses

when we have romance, we have to give space too
til we reach the very last station

we sacrifice, little or more regardless of how low we have to go.
but yet we still have to worry bout how others look at us

whether in passion or in separation,
always remember the first rule
love like you are blind to everything else



need money. now
want to have long hair. tomorrow

the past evaporates into a cloud of dusty smoke... they scatter before us.
we have said goodbye, yet i can't see any hint of sadness in your eyes
all you have given me was routine but even now when i see your sweet smile, i love u even more

suddenly. i understood it all.
all the future that you spoke off, they will never happen
n now, as i look at your face, it is of a stranger. not the face of the one i love.

my world seemed to snow, it became so cold.. that i couldn't love anymore.
so cold that all my hidden sorrows surfaced up and overwhelm me.

we kissed goodbye.. on an empty street
even the wind seemed to ridicule my weak refusal
it was a wild night... n i opened my heart to welcome the grief.

i want to remind u of our memories, but the attempt broke like how a kite breaks away from its string
i m not in your world anymore, no longer the sun in ur eyes
now i see, it was a tragedy all along
i will never be a part of your happy ending, instead i live only in your dreams



i have been researching n this is too cute.. haha
these are some of the rare sounds gliders make

BARK - this is an interesting sound, it sounds much like a puppy yipping.. The meaning of this is still unknown, you must pay attention closely as to what is going on around your glider at the time, also listen for any other noises, even faint ones in the distant. Some ideas as to what this means are..

  • 1. Some say this is to call out for other ones of their "Tribe", or their "person"
  • 2. For attention from their "person". I know a woman whose glider will bark at her in the middle of the night, crawl into his pouch when she looks at him and continues to bark until she literally rocks him to sleep. When she stops, he will continue to bark again, so she will rock him till his sleep is deeper. This is one spoiled glider..
  • 3. Some say it is a warning sound. When the Alpha Glider fears of something that may be a threat, it may bark. I know of an owner who says every time her dog goes near the cage her glider will bark till she goes in and gets the dog out of the room.
  • 4. Story telling. By far this is my favorite. We have sometimes 4 gliders in the cage at a time, mom, dad and offspring. while all are out playing Dad will bark, the others stop, frozen right where they are, and listen all so intently, until he is done. We call that the story time..
  • 5. In reply to sounds out in the distant. We have beagles that stay outside. One night one of our beagles was barking, and our glider barked back, this was too cute for the first hour, but then it continued, back and forth. I would get one shut down, then the other would start again, back and forth this went on for an hour and a half. I finally had to turn on the radio to get some sleep.

  • PURR- This sounds very much like a tiny kittens purr. It is very faint and methodical. It is a sound of contentment, just as a kittens would be. This sound is also one that few people get a chance to hear. With it being so faint, unless the glider is very close to you, for example in your pocket or on your chest, the chances of being able to hear it, is based upon the trust that your glider and yourself has built between you. This sound, had to have the volume increased, the mic was placed directly on her and volume increased by 150%

    CHATTERING - This sounds much like a squirrel clicking , very short, very quick taps.. we usually hear this each morning when our male hears up come near the cage, we interpret it as " Good Morning" or "Hello, glad to see you.".

    CHIRP - This actually sounds like a gurbuling sound, most often, (but not limited to) heard while eating their fav foods.. this clip was turned up in volume, many times so as to get a good idea what the sound is. Definitely a content sound.

    CRYING - This is a sound most generally heard by joeys, or gliders that have just went into a new home and is crying for their mom and/or family.

    SINGING - Glider moms sing to their babies while they are still in the pouch, this is a very sweet and rhythmic sound, and you can definitely tell she is singing to them.. It sounds very much like a churble and changes in pitches and sounds. Much like our music, no two songs are the same. Each time I hear it, I know, and it is by far one of the sweetest sounds I have ever heard.

    FIGHTING/MATING - Now, how to tell the difference, is to learn your gliders.

    • Mating - Obviously, if you have a male and female together, that is of breeding age, they will do this. It is part of their mating ritual, and will be continuous for a long time. I know it drives me nuts, It is very common for people to believe that the males and females are fighting during this time. But it is all part of it. From the time you hear this sound, you can just about count your sixteen days, and have joeys in the pouch.
    • Fighting - very common sound, BetsyCC calls this the "get your foot outta my face " sound. It is a sound of annoyance between 2 gliders. this sound if fussing or fighting, will not generally last for a continually long period of time. If you have just introduced a couple of gliders, and haven't made sure they get along, be sure you watch them closely, this sound could mean the death of one. It is also a sign of dominance. While two gliders are establishing their dominance.

    i can take this no more

    1. i got this job.. of designing really basic n ugly websites. i took up the first project... n so far its going really bad.
    u see they expect powerpoint standard kinda flash. instead of tready, flashy, abstract flash.
    i have been suppressed creatively... very. very. suppppppprrrresed.

    n streessseedd

    2.n then my dad need me to do a portal for him. which i can barely find time to. he barely comes home.. when he does i m too sleepy.. or i m going to go dating with my boyfriend.....

    3. and then the household chores... sweep mop. wash clothes. fold iron. cook. rice. water. milk. sister. bath. oh man. i do not want to get married or have kids for that matter... its so tiring. i do not have time for my work. my health... or anything else.

    appreciate your mothers. please

    monday i did everything...
    tuesday i did everything except mop
    wednesday i did everything except mop
    today i did everything except sweep mop wash clothes.

    talk bout slacking off.

    4. meeqa is doing fine somehow...he loves to come out when i off the lights..n climb all over me.. lick me.. bite me. AIH. it hurts. up to the extent where he hold my fingers with his hands n lick n nip... or my armpit.. or my..'legpit'(go figure.. haha.. tze ching came up with that phrase) n my toes. u know the wedge between fingers n toes.. he would stick his tongue there, lick then nip. OWWW
    he would climb all over me n would sit quietly when i placed the jam jar on my lap. while he ate them.. or the water saucer...
    now he is climbing all over me.. i hope he will be my bra baby soon.. tomoro i will attempt to cut his nails... my body is full of scars cuz of him
    he barks too nowadays to get attention... but all these happen in the dark... i wish he would be like this when the lights come on.. when its lighted, he hides behind the curtains.. in one of my thousand many many bags.all the time he barks.. damn cute.. but i dunno wat he wants.. haha.. he just wants to nuzzle me i suppose... i love him already

    5. the only consolation comes when meeqa is behaving.
    when my sis is being cute... ( what is nature ? she asks
    nature is everything made by god. like stones n grasses, flowers.. man.. animals
    those that are made by man are not nature. like buildings

    n then she asked... but human make babies, then babies is not nature???)

    when going out with ah b.. or talking to him..at least got some attention n praises n consolations after a long day's work..

    guess thats how wives feel. after a long day's work, hoping their husband will enjoy their cooked dinner, n their company...
    n thats how husbands feel as well, after a long day of being thrashed n stressed out at work, in the end hoping for attention n love.
    somehow makes a tiring n awful day perfect n beautiful.. gives them the strength to move on to the next day.

    funny how simple things like that yet many couples fail to do it.

    i miss everybody


    Warner Bros. Pictures has decided to have 'Superman Returns' soar into theaters two days earlier than planned — June 28 — effectively giving the likely mega blockbuster a seven-day, Fourth of July opening weekend.