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i havent been this distressed for a long time

I made a move that is both stupid n foolish
i know its not gonna happen, i know i m stupid for doing it.
and yet i go n do it.
very good. serves me right

II my MAC book pro crashed
when my windows crash.. i will rejoice and think that yay! i can finally upgrade this junk.
but my MAC crashed. nothing could ever prepared me for this day.
i totally love my MAC, i abandoned my useless windows for months, just doting on my MAC
everything is inside. lovely photos, my hard work..
it just crashed. HD failure.
i am so distressed right now.
i can't do anything, because..
1. i don't have a small screwdriver to readjust the position of the hd inside...
2. the boot up disc is in my home far far away for me to try to boot from cd
3. the warranty is also in my home far far away... which is my last resort as they will just replace a new hd for me.. my darling data will be gone.



All bout me

Skin Care

What facial cleanser do you use?

everyone knows that i don't wash my face... but when i m really desperate i use this...

its gel-like.. i put it on my make up face dry.. massage it in and then wash off.. but i used this product since i got into MMU.. so u can practically count how many times i washed my face since coming here... the tube is almost half full

What moisturizer do you use?

i don't use moisturizer too.. hahahaaha OMG i m so MANLY.. FUCK... but there was this period of time after the MTV production when i got really damn dark so i bought this to make myself fair again, but of cos no miracles

How many times a day do you wash your face?
i don't wash my face lok

Do you use eye makeup remover?
yea.. when i m rushed i use baby pet pet wipes.. it works damn good ok..no weird chemicals cuz its for babies.. n wipe off any kind of make up too..

for mascara i will be forced to use the Shu Uemura Oil Cleanser. i din buy it ok.. it came in the prize package i won for the shu uemura competition

If so, What kind?

not this brand la of cos. anything works la. i m not very picky

i bet you can wash tattoo off with this. LOL. its good.. but if it gets in ur eyes ur vision will be blurred for a while..

Is your skin oily, dry, or combination skin?
dunno ah. combo gua

What is the best part about your skin?
that it is smooth? so far la.

What are your skin problems?
I get dark easily... big bad eye bags too.. and when i get pimples. it fucking big ok. n i got pretty bad scars too


What foundation do you use?

ok i used to use Shu Uemura Under UV base, it is damn light but i finsihed it...

so right now i m using Laura Mercier's hydrating foundation in Sand... I love love love it! eh why this questionaire so useless.. never ask about concealers n camouflage one? i ask for it la.

What concealers do you use?

um.. concealers are for eye area right.. cuz it slides and its oily...

so gotta use camouflage for face.. it doesn't slide as much n you can build up on the parts u wanna cove3r, concealer u wanna build it keep sliding. damn annoying

for concealer i use MAC studio stick.. seriously MAC products are damn overrated. useless wan.

camouflage i use laura mercier camouflage. EFFING good lor. really. got 2 shades for u to mix somore

What powder do you use?

Shu Uemura Loose powder... it was in the prize package too.. dunno what to do without it. its ok la.. translucent and light enough

What eyebrow pencil do you use?
Shu uemura seal brown eyebrow pencil.. also from the prize box.. ok la natural lor. but need to sharpen geh

What eyeliner do you use?
some cheap loreal shit . useless. brush damn thick always make me look gothic. fuck la. i need some elegant wand to draw thin lines. not some fat clumsy loreal shit. oh is liquid btw

wow its so bad i cant even find the damn pic

What is your favorite eyeshadow?

hmm.. mac pigments lor..the only usable products from MAC is their eye range products.. ish.. ok la. need to mix with the liquid before usage.. and my pallete is not the one up there.. my got cold colours only

and the kate eyeshadow but my pallete is not in the picture... mine has some gold flakes pallete wan..

What mascara do you use?

i used loreal shocking volume.. it was good la.. but damn hard to wash off cuz of teh white primer... i switched to the lighter majorca majolica mascara.. it is smoother than loreal but the volume it gives is not that good lor. but its lighter n easier to wash off.. if i put the primer first n use the majorca then its good for a dramatic day out. eh why the questionnaire never ask about blush. useless

What blusher do you use?

benefit's benetint. the most natural blush. ever. can last damn long

PLUS it can be used to stain the lips. its kinda cool huh.

What are your favorite lipbalms/glosses/sticks?:

i love shu uemura lipsticks.. once u have used it u wont use anything else.. it is wet, glides easily.. n very good to the touch.. no sticky firm feeling.. very light feeling..

don't buy MAC lipglass pls. awful. its damn dry.. not suitable for young women.. maybe for older women whose lipsticks always feather...

i use maquillage glossy gloss its amazing. it has 3 layers of shine too!

i use shu uemura's lip liner too..mine is in nude

Do you color your hair?

What is your stylists name?
no idea.. its always diff each time

What salon do you go to?
no idea.. its always diff each time maybe thats why my hair look so bad

What is your natural hair color?
dark dark brown lor

What is your hair color now?
lighter shade of brown.. damn sien

Do you have straight or curly hair?
curly naturally...but its north south east west that curly... its not the glam curly

Do you use a curling iron?
Yea..vinn recomended babyliss.. it was good still using it.. i think its industry std if i m not mistaken

A straightener?
Vidal sassoon one

Do you use a blowdryer?
of cos la

Do you use gel and if so, what kind?
Lucido souffle'

Do you use mousse, and if so, what kind?
loreal spray n mousse

What shampoo do you use?
Sunsilk but its bad for me

What conditioner do you use?
Sunsilk lok

Do you use leave in conditioner?
got use vitamin la..


What deodorant do you use?
wats a deodorant????

What body wash do you use?

impulse cool

Do you use a loofah, washcloth or soap to wash?
hand la

What perfumes do you use or like? Name five.
5????? you buy ah.

Narciso Rodriguez however u spell it eu de toilette FOR HER... it has a woody distintive smell to it

and also body splash... from victoria secrets..love it!

Do you always have to smell good?

Are diamonds really a girl’s best friend?
No.. maybe not yet.. i dunno. but No

What is your jewelry essential?
no.. dunno

What jewelry do you wear most?
love ring from my parents

What jewelry do you crave most?
dunno.. belly ring? i dunno

Purses and Shoes

How many purses do you own?

a fake Chloe Paddington from Hong kong. looks like trash now. lol

some old bags..

Which is your favorite?

How many shoes do you own?
10 like that gua.. very little liao ok

Which pair is your favorite?
black peeptoe heels... boots from hk

Who is your favorite handbag designer?
Chloe.. or YSL

Who is your favorite shoe designer?
pasar malam

This or that;

Manolos or Jimmy Choos?

Dolce and Gabbana or Chanel?

Micheal Kors or Bebe?

Louis Vuitton or Coach?

Gucci or Prada?


Favorite Magazine to read?
popteen.. queen.. 2design

Favorite nail polish?
Cheap ones.

Favourite Book?
finally.. something to show my intelligence in this stupid interview.. ok get ready

one hit wonders = audrey niffenneger The time traveller's wife
stolen child

Fantasy - golden compass trilogy by philip pullman
Spiderwick chronicles
edge chronicles by patrick steward and chris riddell
Septimus heap chronicles
Eragon trilogy
Inkheart chronicles
Harry potter duh
lemony snickets

Crime = dean koontz's books
chuck palahnuik's books

Adventure - Wilbur Smith's books

others = twilight chronicles, stephenie meyer

i don't read romance/chick lits.

Favorite Band?

Favorite Girly Movie?
favourite GIRLY movie???? GIRLY>???
ok i had enough of this shit already.

Are you high maintenence?
SUPER LOR. for one, dun ask me about my favourite girly movie. sohai. or favourite band. or some other girly shit

Do you enjoy being a girl?
yes la yes la of cos i like my boobs damn geng ok. this is ridiculous



On a tired evening, exhausted from all the hustle bustle of life
how nice it would be to stumble upon a quaint little bookstore
where i can just shrink into a little corner piled with books around me
step into a new world, away from here
and let the power of words take over me

bookworm bookworm
surrounded by books
crawl out of your hide
look at the real world
for once


make up Diary II

can't seem to work, thought i fool around with photoshop

WARNING! weird things ahead.

this is me. i have big stuff.
big eyes
big nose
big mouth
big boobs
big ego
this is me with little makeup.

this is me with cool green eyes n cute fun lips

this is me when i m feeling like a girl. like a feminine girl.
i m a man but i can pretend ma.

this is me when i m rushed during make up. n i will end up looking like this

this is me when the night before i put my make up, someone praises me
and i m feel that ugly make up will still look good on me

this is me when i m feeling left out and lack of attention

this is me on the coming friday when i get my MAC FAFI eye pallete

this is me in the dreams of my friends

this is me in my dreams

this is me when i m surrounded by old uncles who keep looking my way

this is me when i wanna be someone else or when i feel like murdering someone else

this is me when i sing

this is me in my boyfriend's dream


hair curling basics

a new one i made recently..

nah gape all u wan. me in my full glory .. not taking this down this time i took down too many times already. ish. put already means put already.bLOG LIAO.
wanna see the whole album msg me la. if i say no don't force me


Fuck you

i love being angry
i love being sad
it give such amazing inspiration
dark dark thoughts

listening to the soundtrack of requiem of a dream...
try it. get scared. get angry.
keep all the pics in your mind in a book.




wtf am i

fucking cd

full of plastic
on my face
full of dirt and paint
on me

wtf do i have


where am i

changes in you
the past
present is meaningless.

where the fuck is the future anyway

based on future
where the fuck is the future anyway.

see me pass the plastic
pass the dirt
and the paint
there is naught there

i am just a shell
shell of emptiness.

fill me with dirt and leave me amess
leave me be
let me be
i want to be clean

what do i have but a shell
a temporary home.
house in me, make me bleed
make me cry
so that i know there is something in me

something worthy

sadistic. empty. bitch. just a shell.
thats wtf i am

i dare you.
to come.
make me fucking bleed out of my misery.



Another barrage

smoky eyes with nude lips.. i lazy to talk.. just walkthrough only

this is the hair straightening and styling.. walkthrough only..


Makeover 1

some sort of a smokey eyes with nude lips look...

i feel this is a cleaner and neater look.. i din have to photoshop myself much too... just adjust the curves only... not bad wei... click on the photos for full size

here are the products used
according to the order being used.... except for the last one.. i forgot to number it

1. Shu Uemura UV under base
2. Stila Foundation
13. MAC studio stick concealer
3.Benefit's Benetint blusher
4. Shu Uemura Seal Brown eyebrow pencil
5. Kate Brown and Gold pallete
6. Shu Uemura Eyelash curler
7. Majorca Majolica Mascara
8.Don eyelash adhesive
9. inouvi eyelash
10.Shu Uemura Principe lip serum
11. Shu uemura nude lip liner
12 Shu uemura lipstick BG906
13. Shiseido macquillage glossy gloss

2 youtube tutorials on the way :D


Make up Diary II

Visualization 1


Phew.. Got little bit colour already...

Eyes look better already

hair also ok liao..

before our night out...

walao... this week i did alot of first timers...
first time go out clubbing. ( really clubbing that kind)
first time smoke
first time i din work for a whole week.. just laze laze laze
first time i learnt piano from youtube!!
first time someone buy me 700++ bucks worth of nintendo ds lite!!! WOOT
first time i go back home, my dad took the ds and cabut to office.. T_T
first time got photography job. yay!
first time i shop for alot of make up products at once!
COOLNESS. but no more... no more..

dun wanna act like a depressed maniac already...
i m alright now!!!

wanted to post this very long already.. but keep forgetting everytime cuz it really cant be applied to my life or anything.. i just like the lyrics and the surreal melody.. just like my high school days... lol.. but i know how it feels like

Strange and Beautiful , Aqualung (Wicker Park Soundtrack)

i been watching your world from afar..
been trying to be where you are.
and i have been secretly falling apart

to me.. you are strange and you are beautiful
you will be so perfect with me but you just don't see
you turn every head but you don't see me
sometimes.. the last thing you want comes in first
sometimes.. the first thing you want never comes
and i know. waiting is all you can do

i'll put a spell on you
you'll fall asleep and i'll put a spell on you
and when i wake u i'll be the first thing you see
and you will realize. that you love me.