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5/15/04

THE BEAUTY OF INSECURITY
my head's full of thoughts, thoughts of u. n i m distracted so easy, thinking wat to do.so unsure, so unfamiliar.. m i wrong to think that something could happen. i m not at all like myself, i m playing the role of someone else. my heart's beating so fast i can't stop it.
~delta goodrem



such a feeling's coming over me, there is wonder in most everything i see.
not a cloud in the sky, not a sun in my eyes n i won't be surprised if its a dream..

everything i want the world to be is now coming true especially for me n the reason is clear, its because u r here. u r the nearest thing to heaven that i've seen.

i m on the top of the world looking down on creation n the only explanation i can find is the love that i've found every since u've been around. ur love put me at the top of the world.

something in the wind has learned my name n its telling me that things r not the same. in the leaves of the trees n the touch of the breeze, there's a pleasing sense of happiness for me..

there is only one wish on my mind, when this day is thru i hope that i will find that tomorrow will be just the same for u n me. all i need will be mine if u r here.



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woke up today with my dirty clogged fingers inside my pants, searching for warmth.. i had left both the ceiling fan n the aircon on the other night before as i had long ever since i feel the breeze of an aircon.

snuggled up to the rock hard pillow.. isn't tempting at all.. prefered my bolster.. n for the first time.. the bolster did not morph into him. woohoo. anyone who is clueless refer to...Sunday, April 25, 2004 post. search for it in the archive to ur right.


though i m lonely now.. life's so much more sweeter..n melodious.. i can smile with my heart now without any inner sorrows threading me down.

yawn.......... dad yelling below the stairs for me to wake up.. calling my indian name.. whom close friends always MIScall... YENArrH!!!!!!!

.......for proof.. check the tagboard to ur right.. for someone called CK..n u can see my indian name there.


i indulged in my other n more preferred way of expressing myself.. piano.


n i realized how sad all those pieces i had right then.. none of which suits my light mood....

..wat a nice day... finally i can be myself.. n don't brush my teeth.. or comb my hair.. n wear rags.. look like rags too... i can scratch watever part of my body that i wanna scratch..however obsene... i can fart whenever i like.. burb whenever i like.. belch watever i want..dig my nose whenever i want.. okok.. i'll stop disgusting all of u..


i dug around for all my old sketchbooks... n laugh at all my ugly artworks.. n til now i wonder where is my sketchbook containing all ff8 artworks..........GGRRAHHAHH....... WHO TOOK IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!??


although they weren't good....... still .. ish


ok. i m thinking with all the 72 wheels in my brain n yet i dunno what else to type in here..

of cos not.. i did not go out today.. no events happening watsoever..

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