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ask me one thing i cannot live without n i'll say its the internet.

its just after choir.. n i m starting to feel as if i m insane.. i tend to laugh uncontrollably as in insanely.. starting to hate myself...

i have done something against my own will..so that i could satisfy others.. for other's happiness..while i neglected mine.. so that i don't hurt someone important with my past.

i feel so stale. so stiff wording out lies effortlessly...putting emotions into nothing but lies..
lies i could tell effortlessly because they was once the naked truth.

now i had to live in lies.. n face the happiness i chose not to have with fake laughter.

yes. i know all of u don't understand. i won't explain.

i lived to lose those i love.

i won't cry.. i'll be happy i m able to be near..
i won't be too near.. i'll be distant enough just to love.
i won't tell the truth.. its only lies i can handle..
i won't hold you.. i m afraid i won't let go once i start.
i m sorry.. the choice was difficult, the easy way out was living the life i used to live.
i have given too much before, unti i have no more to give to u.
but i love you

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